Being a denizen of the internet – nay, a connoisseur – I take exception to how the internet is being portrayed in the latest Nancy Meyers chick flick The Holiday. As described in the comic, Cameron Diaz and Kate Winslet use our global communications tool in order to trade houses over the holidays in order to get over their hearbreak and maybe… just maybe… learn a little about loving themselves in the process. Everyone with me now… "AWWWWWW!"

This is not to say that I find the entire practice of house-swapping outside the scope of reality. I’m sure people do it (on occassion) maybe using a community portal like craigslist to get the job done. All I’m suggesting is that things wouldn’t turn out quite so tidy if the REAL internet was employed?

Have you seen the trailers for this film? Essentially the two female leads live in equally fabulous, well-lit homes, decorated richly within an inch of their lives. "Oh, I have man troubles but I live in a friggin’ palace! Boo hoo!"

Look, I realize that this is a romantic fantasy of sorts and that films of this nature are supposed to be aspirational and fanciful. I get that. How boring would it be to go to a movie that replicated reality exactly. It’s an escape. I’m all for it.

But what are the odds that these two women could find each other online, half a world away and trade environments equally as cozy as the one they just left? In the real world, Cameron Diaz would go online to trade homes with someone and end up at the bottom of a well dug out from the basement of Buffalo Bill from The Silence of the Lambs.

Switching gears… I know some of you are interested in learning about how the first Theater  Hopper talkcast went on Monday night. Well, I can tell you that it’s a good thing we attempted to go for a dry run to test out the technology first because I totally screwed things up.

Something I didn’t account for when setting up the broadcast is that TalkShoe doesn’t give you the option of setting up the show by time zone. So when I was telling everyone the show would be 10:00 CST, it was really set to go at 9:00 CST because apparently TalkShoe is hosted somewhere on the East Coast and doesn’t allow for time changes.

I had no idea that the show was even up and running at 9:00 until Jared called me at home to notify me. I sent him an invitation to listen in and he was going to leave me a note saying he couldn’t make it when he noticed the discrepency in time, gave me a call and say "Uh… there are people in there waiting for the show to start!"

So I promptly abandoned my TiVo’d recording of Heroes and ran to my computer to hop online. After nearly tearing my hair out when Skype’s touch-tone recognition wouldn’t permit me to log onto my own show (it misinterpreted my ID log on "7738" as "7788") I finally managed to get on and get things underway.

Things were a little rocky for the first 45 to 60 minutes because I was a little bit shaken by the last minute scramble and I tried to invent subjects to talk about off the top of my head. In the effort not to put too much pressure on myself, I went too far and was completely untethered.

Eventually things started picking up when Brandon J. Carr (formerly of The Kenmore) logged in and we then spent most of the evening swapping stories. Everything from the Michael Richards rant, to Spider-Man 3, Van Wilder 2, The Three Stooges and Jabberjaw. It was nuts. A few other people called in and left comments and we had a grand old time. By the time it was said and done, we were had been on the air for almost 3 hours!

Despite the trail by fire in the opening moments, I really enjoyed being on-air and talking to others. It totally reminded me of being on the radio when I was in college and I loved that job. If you weren’t able to log on during the live broadcast, you can download an MP3 of the entire show on the Theater Hopper talkcast page. Check it out. You can have it on in the background while you’re answering e-mails or reading through the topics on the THorum, or whatever.

I had a lot of fun doing the show. That’s why I’ve scheduled another show for next Monday, December 11 at 8:00 PM CST. And don’t worry – I made sure to tell the TalkShoe system that it starts at 9:00 EST – their time – to eliminate any confusion.

It would be really great if you guys could join in. That’s why I’ve scheduled the show for earlier in the evening so more of you can participate. I’m hoping to line up some special guests for the show. You never know who might swing by!

I’ll be sure to remind everyone again on Monday. Until then, take it easy!