Posts Tagged ‘Rambo’

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THE PLANET OF LONELY HOUSEWIVES

by Tom on May 6, 2009 at 12:00 am
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(47 votes, average: 6.89 out of 10)
Star Trek, reboot, not your father's, Die Hard, Rambo, aging, Captain James T. Kirk, Scotty, Viagra
Vote for Theater Hopper at Top Web Comics

Would anyone be surprised to find out that Captain Kirk was a Viagra fiend? Not me. In fact, I'm pretty sure he'd go on some elaborate adventure and time-travel back to the 20th century to make sure it's been invented.

He's a horn dog, is what I'm saying.

But what will Viagra be like in the 23rd Century? Vote for Theater Hopper at Top Web Comics for an incentive sketch that explores this vital issue!

Star Trek comes out this weekend and I'd say I'm excited for it. I was never that big of a fan of the original series, though. I mean, I liked the actors and I LOVE the characters. But the low production value of those shows from the 60's leaves me cold. I liked the movies a lot, though. Obviously Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan is everyone's favorite ("KHHHHHAAAAAAAAAN!"). But I also really like Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country.

Despite the fact that I've seen nearly every episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation, probably 85% of Star Trek: Deep Space 9 and most of Star Trek: Voyager and Star Trek: Enterprise, I don't really consider myself "a trekker." I really think of myself more as a Star Wars nerd.

I think it depends on which franchise got to you first. I was born in 1977. I'm in the sweet-spot when it comes to the influence of Star Wars. I wasn't introduced to Star Trek until I was in high school and was looking for an excuse to stay up late while waiting for Late Night with Conan O'Brien to come on. Where I lived, The Next Generation was running in syndication at 10:30 at night. It worked out perfectly because it got me hooked.

I know that there are some hard-core trekkers who are concerned about this reboot with a younger cast. I can understand why. I mean, the first Star Trek probably had a perfect cast. Certainly Shatner and Nimoy were a pairing for the ages.

But of all the franchises that have been rebooted in the last few years - Batman, James Bond, Hulk, Punisher - it was probably Star Trek that needed it most of all.

I think this film is probably the antithesis of X-Men Origins: Wolverine in terms of building positive buzz and anticipation. Whereas X-Men Origins: Wolverine was like a awkward teenager trying desperately to get you to like them (advertising for more than a year, a million clips and commercials, gimmicky alternate endings shipped to different theaters), Star Trek has been playing it close to the vest.

Whereas I felt I knew everything about X-Men Origins: Wolverine, I feel like I know next to nothing about what Star Trek is going to give us.

From the trailers, I can tell that this version of James T. Kirk is more cocky than the original. Maybe even somewhat of a problem child. I know the bridge of the U.S.S. Enterprise looks like an Apple store and I know Eric Bana's character is bald. Beyond that, all I know is that there appears to be a lot of lens flares in space.

But plot-wise? No idea. And I like it that way.

I'll probably have more to say about Star Trek with Friday's comic. So, to keep you entertained in the meantime, please enjoy these video remixes from Star Trek: The Next Generation. There's a guy on YouTube who has put together nearly two dozen of these and they're hilarious! Enjoy!

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EVERYONE HAS THEIR FAVORITE

by Tom on January 25, 2008 at 6:23 pm
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(1 votes, average: 7.00 out of 10)
Sylvester Stallone, Rocky Balboa, Rambo, Over The Top, sequel

I always enjoy putting together the comics where Tom enacts some kind letter-writing campaign. Not only for the anachronistic joy of longhand letter-writing in the age of e-mail, but because there is typically a child-like innocence to his requests. I think as I go on, I make these sessions more and more child-like, as evident by Tom's slumped over the table posture in the third panel.

As for Rambo, what can I say? I've been sold. I'm excited to see this movie. You can thank the take-no-prisoners trailer for that.

Of course, it's very possible that I will be screwed by this. The Alien vs. Predator: Requiem trailer was awesome, too - and look where that got me.

I don't think anyone would ever confuse the Rambo movies for being plot-motivated. They've always been about brutality and ingenuity in combat. There's very little to say about Rambo except he's always pissed off and looks good without a shirt on.

To that end, I should be just as opposed to Sylvester Stallone revisiting the character as I was when he put on the gloves for Rocky Balboa.

But I don't know. This time, it's different...

Maybe my heart has softened somewhat, but I'm much more enamored by Stallone for refusing to let the fact that he's 62 prevent him from doing these movies. I mean, action films are a young man's game. He's basically giving the middle finger to that and I kind of respect him for it!

When you think about the fact that between the Rocky and Rambo movies, Stallone's marquee value alone continues to propel the franchises, it makes the producers of other long standing franchises like James Bond look like they're asleep at the switch. I mean, there have been four actors to have played Bond since Stallone first played Rambo. They haven't turned the character over to some younger actor. Stallone IS Rambo. No one else can play him. That's saying something.

So kudos, Mr. Stallone. I'm giving you a pass on Rambo. Even though I know it will probably suck, even though Rocky Balboa is probably the better film and my stubborn attitude about baby boomers refusing to lay down and let the next generation through prevented me from seeing it, you've earned my respect.

Incidentally, for those of you wondering about the punchline to today's comic, Over The Top is probably the best "worst" Stallone film ever made. The movie's tagline alone sells it - "His name is Hawk. He's fighting for his son."

WHAT ELSE DO YOU NEED TO KNOW?!

Okay, let me spell it out a little bit more. Stallone plays a big-rig trucker who tries to reconnect with his son after his ex-wife, the boy's mother passes away. Of course the kid is a brat who has been pampered by his mother's rich family. Stallone is going to show this kid what's-what and how to stand up for himself... (wait for it) THROUGH COMPETITIVE ARM-WRESTLING!

Best awesomely bad movie ever. Netflix it now.

So if Stallone is revisiting Rocky and Rambo, I demand to see a follow up to Over The Top. Your FANS demand it, Sly!

At any rate, that's all I have for now. I know I promised you some reactions to the Oscar announcements on Wednesday and I didn't get to them. But I guess it's because I haven't fully digested them yet.

I can give you the high-level overview, though. I was really surprised that Juno was nominated for Best Picture. Not that it isn't a good movie, but what about Zodiac or The Assassination of Jesse James? I was pleased to see that Ratatouille was nominated for Best Animated Feature, but was shocked to also see it nominated for Best Original Screenplay. Incidentally, I think it's a crock that Surf's Up was nominated in the Animated Feature category while The Simpsons Movie was totally snubbed.

Beyond that... I don't know. Not too many surprised. The most nominations were split between There Will Be Blood and No Country For Old Men. No real surprises there.

I guess it's hard to get my hopes up about the Oscars when we don't know if there will even be a televised broadcast to get wrapped up in. I didn't mind when the writer's strike put the kibosh on The Golden Globes. I don't care what the Hollywood Foreign Press has to say anyway. But the Oscars hit a little closer to home. So I guess I'm just shielding myself from the eventual let down if the show doesn't happen.

I probably need more time to think about it, but that's all I have for now. I hope everyone has a great weekend! See you here on Monday!

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