Disaster Movie comes out this weekend and if you don’t think this movie looks like it was made for five dollars, check out the production stills on IMDB and get back to me.

I’m not particularly interested in ragging on Disaster Movie (I get more of a chuckle out of making Jared "the heavy" in this strip) because it’s like shooting fish in a barrel. But I was looking back over the previous films in this dire franchise and was trying to figure out the formula for it’s success.

Date Movie, Epic Movie, Meet The Spartans and Superhero Movie are some of the lowest common denominator films out there. They get trashed by critics and I seem to know very few people who watch them or enjoy them. So why do they keep getting the green light?

It has to come down to simple economics. Cheap to produce and released on slow weekends against weak competition. Even if the movies only stay in the theaters a week, they more than make up their production cost. Then it’s on to the next steaming turd of a parody starring a brand new cast of unnamed actors who will work for scale.

Say what you want about the Scary Movie franchise, but at least they kept some of the characters consistent throughout those four films…

This is a stray thought not really tethered to anything, but I was looking at the production stills again and was kind of admiring how quickly they get their parody to market on some of these films. Indiana Jones, Hellboy II, The Hulk – these are references to some fairly recent movies.

I would almost be impressed if the impact of these references extended beyond the recognition factor and were actually funny. “Hey! I just saw that movie a few weeks ago and now they’re makin’ fun of it! That’s amaaaaaazing!” It’s a parlor trick for the easily impressed. The cinematic equal of a big rock band coming to your down and saying "It’s a thrill to be back in… [insert name of town here]!” The people who “WOO!” in recognition of their city being named… that’s who Disaster Movie is for.

Gotta cut it short tonight. I’m feeling a little under the weather. Stress catching up with me perhaps. I was a little bit down in the dumps this morning with a stuffy nose and an itchy throat. I thought it was allergies. But now I know for certain that I’m sick. So I’ve got to drink my Ovaltine and go to bed.

See you back here on Friday!

↓ Transcript
One ticket for Disaster Movie, please!


Sir, do you realize that with your ticket purchase, you will have secured a 200% return on investment for the producers and will only encourage them to make MORE of those parodies?

Wait. That's impossible. That would mean the movie was produce for five dollars.


It's quite the scam.