For the record, I am painted green in today’s strip because I want to be more like The Hulk.

And yes, I am wearing pants.

I didn’t get an opportunity to watch this, the first-ever all-pirate Super Bowl mostly because I have been spending the weekend installing laminate flooring in my kitchen. Most of my spare time has been spent recuperating.

But consider yourself lucky that you got a strip today. I could have very easily sawed off a thumb. I was dealing with circular saws, compound miter saws, even tiny handsaws for three days straight.

This basically makes Cami’s one-liner in the last panel perfectly moot in the real world. I operated power tools, dammit! POWER TOOOOOOOLS!

All things the same, I did get to see the trailers in question… just not during the Super Bowl. All of them I caught on line long before Sunday.

I saw the first few Hulk teaser trailers a while ago and think they’re very well done. The don’t show much of ol’ Jade Jaws, and that’s good. The people involved in this movie know half of the draw is seeing how they put a 8 foot tall green behemoth on the screen.

I’m still pretty amazed that Ang Lee is directing this thing. I mean, this is the same guy who directed Sense and Sensibility. It doesn’t add up.

The latest Daredevil trailer makes the movie look really good, but I’m still afraid Ben Affleck is gonna screw it up. He wouldn’t have been my first choice to play The Man Without Fear. Hell, Matt Damon would be better! But, like I sucker, I go see it.

Terminator 3 looks lamest of the bunch. For some reason, this seems like Ah-nold’s last hurrah as an action hero. I don’t seem him making any more pictures like this.

The plot of Rise of the Machines looks predictably lame. To up the ante, there is an even MORE advanced Terminator coming after John Conner – the T-X. And, of course, it’s a woman. So what do they send back in time to protect him? Another T-800 which, by this point, must be shockingly behind the curve-technology wise. And why are the outsides of these things getting more wrinkled and leathery? Hmmm…

Anyway, that’s it for current stuff. Here’s some gristle to chew on…

Last Friday’s strip got a very strong response. Apparently a lot of you feel just as strongly about Jerry Bruckheimer as I do. But I’m beginning to think it’s less and less the fault of producers like him, but instead, the sweeping gullibility of the American public. Did anyone else see that Darkness Falls was #1 at the box office this weekend? Expect some commentary on that this Wednesday.

Secondly, last Friday I made mention of an e-mail I received from “a certain Carmike Cinema employee” who told me how Kangaroo Jack sold out two showings in his theater. I was mistaken when I thought he wished to remain nameless. That was not the case.

So, credit where credit is due, Adam Douglas is the one who provided me with that heart-stopping statistic. Sorry, Adam.

I guess you could say I’m just trying to put right what once went wrong. Kind of like Dr. Sam Beckett in Quantum Leap

↓ Transcript

Super Bowl, eh? I had no idea you were so interested in football.


No way, baby! I'm in it for the commercials! They're broadcasting trailers for all of this summer's hottest movies! The Hulk, Terminator 3, Daredevil! It's a once in a lifetime event!

Is there, like, a testosterone pill you can take, or something?