I’m not expecting a hell of a lot of traffic today, what with it being Memorial Day and all. So this next message is for our fans outside of the U.S.

Gee, you’re cool!

That being the case, do you think you could extend a little vote love my way so Monday isn’t a total bust? Thanks.

Gotta give props to my friend Nick who pointed out the plot hole in question from Bruce Almighty. Nick had a much more fervently negative reaction to the film than I did. I enjoyed the film, so I guess I got snowed.

Well, actually. That’s not entirely true. I really only liked the second act. The rest of the movie was crap.

Basically, the first act is all set up explaining why Jim Carrey hates God. He’s getting passed over at work. He gets stuck in traffic. He gets beaten up by a gang of Latino toughs. Typical “God is picking on me” kind of stuff. But Carrey complains so often and so LOUDLY, it’s becomes very annoying to listen to him whine for a half hour.

The second act is much more satisfying because we actually get to see Carrey use God’s powers in some imaginative ways. When he forces a co-worker who stole his position as anchor at the TV station he works for to speak in tongues, it’s hilarious. When he causes a meteor to slam into the planet only yards away from where he is covering a chili cook-off dressed as Mark Twain, it’s genius. Really, it’s all just an excuse to get Carrey to ad lib for an hour or so.

But the third act is totally lame. Realizing that he can’t handle the awesome burden of being God, Carrey learns A VALUABLE LESSON(tm) to “be the miracle” instead of bugging God to solve all of his problems. Yech!

This MESSAGE wouldn’t have been so unbearable if the filmmakers hadn’t chosen to beat us over the head with it repeatedly during the course of the movie’s last 30 minutes.

Of course, there are a million inconsistencies between being all-powerful and just plain uncreative. Within the structure of the story, Carrey isn’t allowed to screw with free will, but pretty much everything else is fair game.

When Carrey mistakenly causes a riot by granting everyone’s prayers, he could easily clean the whole thing up with a snap of his fingers. But does he do that? No! Instead he runs looking for Morgan Freeman not unlike Jimmy Stewart looking for Clarence in It’s A Wonderful Life. It’s no coincidence that they reference it blatantly in a couple of scenes.

Of course, the movie wouldn’t have been very interesting if Carrey had a totally free ride. But you can’t expect the powers that allow the moon to be pulled out of orbit to be ignored by the audience when Carrey runs out of the way of a falling billboard as if he were mortal.

I kind of feel sorry for Jim Carrey at this point. He’s caught between being the funnyman everyone wants him to be and the “serious actor” he sees himself as. He’s pushing 40, folks. He can’t keep up his brand of physical comedy forever. My fear is that he’ll get stuck between genres and end up with nothing.

And that would be a shame.