Theater Hopper
About Links Store Contact Thorum

Posts Tagged ‘headline’

1 item.
Jun08

THE REALLY IMPORTANT ISSUES

June 8th, 2005 | by Tom
  • Comics
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars6 Stars7 Stars8 Stars9 Stars10 Stars
(1 votes, average: 10.00 out of 10)
THE REALLY IMPORTANT ISSUES

I tried to draw a picture of Tom Cruise in a business suit holding up a samurai sword based off a still I found from The Last Samurai. It didn’t turn out very well. So if you don’t feel like voting for Theater Hopper at Webcomics List today, I won’t hold it against you. After all, we ∗are∗ at the number one spot right now, so we can rest on our laurels a little bit!

Everyone seems to have an opinion about the romance he seems to have sparked with erstwhile resident of Dawson’s Creek – Katie Holmes. However, it seems that conventional wisdom dictates that the relationship is a sham. A shameless publicity stunt to help cook up interest in both Thespians upcoming June releases – War of the Worlds and Batman Begins, respectively.

Although I am largely a cynic, my greatest weakness is the notion of romantic love. So I find myself playing Devil’s Advocate and imagining reasons why the union of TomKat ∗isn’t∗ manically devised and orchestrated to be intentional ttabloid fodder.

Also, I hate siding with conventional wisdom.

For me, it’s all about motive. I can certainly understand why Holmes would want to hitch her wagon to Cruise. It’s what’s typically known in the industry as “dating up.” She has nothing to lose by being seen with him and it certainly raises her profile in relation to the other actors starring in Batman Begins.

Among the principal cast, you have Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Morgan Freeman, Liam Neeson and Gary Oldman. Maybe co-star Cillian Murphy’s (as The Scarecrow) stock is among the same caliber and audiences certainly aren’t as familiar with Ken Wantanabe (as Ra’s Al Ghul). But ultimately, when people hear there’s a new Batman movie coming out, they aren’t saying “Hey, isn’t that the new Katie Holmes movie?” Now we’re thinking twice…

Now on the other side of the isle, what does Tom Cruise get out of this? Certainly publicity for War of the Worlds isn’t an issue. If Cruise’s name on the marquee doesn’t attract ticket buyers, than certainly Steven Spielberg as director will. It doesn’t hurt that the material they’re covering is a sci-fi classic.

So what possible benefit could there be for an A-list celebrity to date a B-list, or possible C-list celebrity nearly 16 years his junior? Why go on the Oprah Winfery show, act like a loon and have people start questioning your sanity?

Then again, the better question might be “Why would you ever leave Nicole Kidman in the first place?” But I digress.

Accessing the conspiracy theory corner of my brain, I imagine a situation where Tom and Katie met each other at some kind of ritzy Hollywood shin-dig, got to talking and realized how hilarious it would be if the two of them got together.

Realizing that the press and the majority of American’s would view their relationship as a stunt, they would play it up to the hilt. Lavish attention on each other at movie premieres, act bizarre with members of the press when questioned about it and even lob about rumors of marriage to really bring things to a boil.

Then after both War of the Worlda and Batman Begins premier in theaters, they would issue a joint press conference and admit to the world that – yes – their time together WAS a publicity stunt. It was all part of an elaborate scheme to expose the folly of “entertainment journalism” and the country fell for it hook, line and sinker.

But stepping away from that theory, I realize that the public backlash against being hoodwinked to such a degree would be enormous and the careers of both actors would probably be squashed immediately.

As such, I have to resign myself to the possibility that the TomKat relationship is not a stunt. Just another slight of hand by Cruise’s team of image manipulators to further convince the country that their client isn’t gay.

└ Tags: concerns, headline, Katie Holmes, Oprah, paper, publicity stunt, romance, Tom Cruise
[ No Comments ]

Archives

    Tweets by @tombrazelton
    • The Comic
    • The Author
    • The Cast
    • Supporting
      Theater Hopper
    • Press
    • Ranked Comics
    • Year Three Backers
    Enter your email address:

    Delivered by FeedBurner

    Tag Cloud

    Adam Sandler advertising announcement auction Ben Affleck buzzComix Charlie Christmas costume death dream dress up DVD fire first appearance Guest Strip Halloween help Hollywood Iron Man Iron Man 2 Jimmy Joe and Monkey Joe Dunn Nothing Nice to Say Oscar Oscars Pixar podcast punch review Robert Downey Jr. Shia LaBeouf Spider-Man store theater The Triple Feature Top Web Comics trailer Truman Victor vote voting Wizard World Chicago Zach Miller
    HOME | ABOUT | LINKS | STORE | CONTACT | TOP RATED
    THEATER HOPPER by Tom Brazelton - The internet's longest running movie-themed webcomic. Updating every Monday, Wednesday and Friday since 2002. All content © Tom Brazelton, Theater Hopper Inc. 2002 - 2009 unless otherwise noted. Please seek author's permission before reproduction. // Privacy Policy

    Integrated by Frumph |Powered by WordPress with ComicPress |Subscribe: RSS